Body, Mind, & Spirit

Rocks do not have feelings. But, humans definitely do, and that’s ok. That’s the basic premise for this intriguing book about mental health. Mark Freeman is not a licensed therapist. It's important to understand that when evaluating the advice he proposes. He’s more of a mental fitness coach, giving practical tips on how to navigate a healthy path based on his personal experience. He candidly shares the negative effects that OCD and anxiety had on his own daily life and relat

It seems like everyone (including yours truly) has a side hustle (or two?) these days, doesn’t it? Multitasking has become the way of the world in an ever increasingly frantic charge to get ahead. Competition is fierce out there, and enough just never seems to equal enough. Is this fast paced, driven lifestyle sustainable? Or even desirable? Jefferson Bethke says no.

When I was a young mom I took a series of cake decorating classes. I wanted to know how to make cute, unique cakes for my kids' birthdays. It was fun learning to make my own icing and create roses and fancy designs. I spent hours working on what, in many ways, were art pieces. My favorite that I ever made was an aquarium cake. Imagine seaweed made from green fruit leather. You get the idea. It was a lot of work, but I loved the process.

There is a toll taken on our minds and bodies when they are continually active, and not given the chance to rest. Physical exhaustion and mental fatigue ensue, and even anxiety and depression can result in extreme cases. I knew I was far too busy and needed to slow down, but I didn't realize the full extent of how severe it was until I actually tried to do it.

10 time wasters I personally discovered and eliminated or at least limited: (maybe some of these will sound familiar to you too)

One of the most powerful realizations I ever had was that I have no future. I don't mean that in a fatalistic way. Simply that the future isn't actually real. It is only an illusion or idea of what might or might not be real someday. So I have hope for things in the future, of course, but I don't have an actual future that can be owned, pinned down or guaranteed. A million factors could come along between this moment and a future moment to alter the outcome or course I am on.

In our modern world we run awfully fast. In addition to our primary jobs, many of us have "side-gigs." In the pursuit of lofty goals we push ourselves so hard sometimes that we have no days off. Many households are being run by single parents. That's a lot to carry alone. Cell phones are a blessing, but also mean that we are "available" 24/7. Even in downtime we are busily scrolling social media and games. There is immense pressure to keep our bodies and homes magazine worthy

Untethered and alive at last. Stepping into my passion hurts a little. But it’s the sweetest kind of pain that leads to joy.

Who do you love? I mean really, really love? What do you love? Deep down at your core? Sometimes it can be surprisingly hard to sort this out actually. Your brain may give one answer, while your actions are telling a different story.

Love people. Just simply love them and they will feel it. Never miss a chance to make someone else smile. Their happiness will radiate right back to you.

We can wait it out patiently. At times that is all we can do. But usually there comes a critical moment where we have the opportunity to make a decision. To consciously look for the benefits that can come from the twists and turns life throws at us, and deliberately walk toward them. To not only endure the tears, but choose to embrace ways to transform them into happiness. On purpose. To actively participate in turning your "why me" into your Why.

I ran and I ran and I ran, several times a week. I was seeing improvement at long last, but dreaded going out every day. I was pushing myself grudgingly along one morning, as usual, mumbling to myself about how much I hated running, when I suddenly just stopped in my tracks and started to laugh. Wait...what?? I hated running, I realized. Not because it was hard, or because I lacked drive or willpower. I had achieved many other fitness goals in other realms over time, that too

We understand this concept instinctively when it comes to money. If we have a thousand dollars to invest, we will search for the vehicle that will bring us the highest return on investment, and put our money there. This just makes sense right? But do we do this with our time?

Do you have something in your life that you would like to change or accomplish that seems elusive and impossible? Think about ONE thing you CAN do today that starts you moving in that direction, even if it seems insignificant or like it won't make much impact. The biggest change will be in YOU. That you believed in yourself enough to start walking.

The rise and fall of the lungs. The continuous flow of living. Embrace it. Allow that rhythm to sustain your body, soul and vitality without impeding it. Breathe into it. Just breathe.

I had my older kids pretty much convinced when they were little that "shut up" was a swear word. I still kind of think of it that way. There is a cruelty in such a demand. To enforce or even imply that someone else's voice ought to be silenced is arrogant and often dangerous.

Don't over think it. Don't judge it. Don't restrain it. Just follow joy where it leads and embrace the journey.

I believe that one of the greatest challenges of this journey called life, is learning to find beauty in the broken. To piece-by-piece create something unique and new as often as is required. Lessons learned, compassion gained, perspective and strength all combine into the dazzling mosaic of a life reimagined.

Is a dandelion pretty? I guess it depends on how you decide to look at it, and whether you focus on the weeds or the wishes. The same is true for a body image or even a life. Where your focus goes...that is what you will see. But that may not be the whole picture.

On the day that I die, whenever that time may come, my hope and prayer is that I will leave echos of love and light behind me. The incomparable Mae West once said, "You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough." In other words - Make it Count!

One day at a time. One step at a time. One breath at a time. One task at a time. This is your life. Be there.

Your value does not decrease based on someone else's inability to see and appreciate your worth. It makes zero actual difference what anyone else thinks at all. Stay close to those who know that you are a unique gem, and help you to believe it too.

It is about THANKS and GIVING. Hugs. Smiles. Love. Let's take some time this week to refocus our lives on these beautiful principles. Life changing in their simplicity. And make a commitment and a plan as to how to incorporate them into the rest of the year as well, so they become part of our very beings. Gratitude is the foundation of joy. You can't really have one without the other.

After a couple of months taking ballroom dance lessons, I have come to a surprising realization. The hardest part for me has not been the steps or the rhythm as I had expected. Those have been coming fairly naturally. As it turns out, the thing I have found most challenging is learning how to follow.

Ahhh the proverbial elephants in the room. You know - those things we don't talk about that continue to grow until they finally force our attention.

Learning to create and exist in the quiet is well worth the effort. To truly hear what your heart has to say, when you take the time to listen. It may surprise you.

It is often from emptiness that beauty is born, and only empty arms are free to give a hug to someone who needs one. Empty bank accounts, wine glasses and gas tanks can all be refilled. Souls can be too.

To me the ocean, in essence, is a place of love where my inner child laughs and plays. And that, above all, is where its true magic and beauty is found.

Single parenting is not for sissies. It's really tough. So I want you to know today that you are seen. You are known. You are loved. I understand, because I am in the trenches beside you. Most of us didn't plan to become single parents. Life took turns we didn't expect, but yet here we are.

What have YOU been putting off and waiting for? It's never too late to believe in your dreams, even the ones you haven't nurtured for awhile.

What does that look like when we are doing more than we can? How do we recognize when we have crossed the line?

The internet is great for facts, figures, amusing anecdotes and research. We can even find self-help information, motivation and a form of connection on its pages. But spiritual inspiration, advice from loved ones and intuition are important resources too, when seeking answers to the questions that matter most. Love and pure wisdom on a real, personalized level are not found on a computer screen, and I don’t believe they ever will be.

I don’t know who needs to hear this today, but YOU ARE ENOUGH. Let that sink deeply into your heart, and believe it.

We never can eliminate all possible problems or sources of angst, but we can live a life full of joy in spite of them. Happiness can be a powerful antidote to fear if we allow it be.

By “normal” I really mean “necessary,” because sadly it probably actually is the norm for people to continue to live with hurts and disappointments, even when they don’t have to. Lasting change is hard, and takes long term determination and commitment, but it’s so worth it to feel the joy of the difference.

Halloween is not the only day of the year that you get to decide how you want to look, act and be. That is your choice anew, every single day of your life. Masks are fine for occasional fun, but don’t wear one every day. The face of your true self is beautiful - so I challenge you to find it, embrace it, and let it proudly shine.

Jealousy cannot stand in the face of gratitude and love for others. So let's retrain that impulse to envy into an impulse to be overjoyed when others succeed. In fact, to help them to do so as often as possible. Let’s turn that envious moment into a gratitude fest and watch how fast that changes our feelings. With this mindset the answer to “are you sure you’re jealous?” will almost always be NO!!

There are a couple of lies we frequently tell. I am speaking of myself primarily of course, but these are actually pretty common. Almost universal. We proclaim these falsehoods in an effort to excuse all sorts of behavior. We tell these lies to others, but even more destructively we convince ourselves that they are true.

On a rainy day we can see the inconvenience and gloomy clouds, or we can see how beautiful the mist looks floating through the trees. We can look forward to how green the grass will be after the much needed moisture. Both perspectives are accurate. But one makes you feel happy, while the other does not. So which one will you choose??

The more you practice the easier it becomes to stop negative thoughts in their tracks and replace them with positive ones instead. Even if it feels forced at first, stick with it and you'll be amazed at the outcome. You can't always change other people's minds, but it is always within your power to change your own. You can't always change your circumstances, but you can always choose your reaction to them. This is the miracle that gratitude offers us, if we will just accept i

When we act with kindness, and forgive the failings of those around us, we ourselves are more at peace, healthier and happier. So don't do it for them. Do it for you!!

Life's little (and sometimes big) trials and annoyances can't entirely be avoided. They must be dealt with, both physically and emotionally. Cultivating a spirit of gratitude, however, can help us manage those stressful realities by giving us the perspective of our blessings to offset them.

BURNOUT!! When you hear that phrase what thoughts and feelings come up for you? Work starting to feel like a grind? Kids and housework seem like a never ending whirlwind of need? Wash, rinse, repeat!!When in this mode we need to hit the pause button on all major decisions, and simply take a day off.

I adore butterflies. Their whole story fascinates me. The images of metamorphosis and positive change are embodied in them. I love that they are both delicate and resilient. They are beautiful, but far more than just a pretty face.

Only the courage to reach beyond the shallow will lead us to lasting love and friendship. To a life of true passion and purpose. To spiritual centering and peace. There is potential for pain in these areas of course. In fact, suffering is almost guaranteed. But also the most exquisite joy.

Recently I feel myself changing inside. Softening. Slowing down. Refocusing my priorities. I must confess that there are some games I no longer have the will to win.

We have many limiting beliefs that are holding us back from peace and progress. They can make us feel inferior, afraid and simply stuck. What if you could wake up in the morning free of these distractions and live your life with joy? Believing in infinite possibilities? Guess what? You can!!

I believe in urging ourselves to strive for goals even when they are really hard. I believe that to be successful in this life you have to be resilient. To be willing to do what others won’t. To be able to feel the burn and keep moving forward. However, (and this is a HUGE however) sometimes you also need to be wise enough not to. Sometimes it takes even greater strength to know when to stop. So are you tough enough? 

I'd like to think that most people that know me would consider me a pretty nice person. Kindness is something I deeply value and try hard to embody and demonstrate in my life. The unfortunate truth is, however, that sometimes that desire to be perpetually "nice" can end up having some decidedly "not nice" consequences. It can even be skillfully used against you by those with selfish motives.

I'm not saying to go crazy and follow every whim or fancy that strikes you. I'm just saying that is is OK to say YES sometimes too. And when we do choose to say NO, to be careful of the internal narrative surrounding that. Are we saying no because we honestly don't want to do something? Or because, considering our health and other factors, we determine that saying no is the best decision? Awesome!! Well done.